Wednesday, July 29, 2015

Mom-Friend Dating and Squishy Baby Photos

Being a new mom living in a new place, I think a lot about ways to find friends in my community, including mom-friends.  I have heard it said many times that friend dating is much more difficult than regular dating, and I can see how that would be... At least with mom-friends there is the solid pick-up line of, "Your baby is adorable!  How old is he?"  Works every time to engage a mom in conversation in any situation.  (I can say this from my vast experience of using the line once at the mall play area today.)  I can then pretty easily drop in the fact that I am new to the area; then I ask them if they have lived around here for a while..... We can then chat for a bit (Moms seem generally to be eager to speak to someone who is not their child, no matter how random the stranger is...Again judging from all of my vast experience in this matter.)

Then, the wall comes....How do you seal the deal?  Jump from mall stalker to friend?  I never exactly dated (I'm only married, der).. I was just too shy and awkward and whatever the opposite of assertive is.  Being uncharacteristically straightforward was part of how I ever got married in he first place ('nother story).  So there it is.  I think the answer is to go up to people and ask if they want to be friends until I find someone who isn't creeped out by that.  Haha. Looking back, this tactic has worked oddly well for me over the years.  I think it almost worked in the mall today.  I bet I'll see that girl again. :)  Really my goal is to find someone else who moved to the area recently, preferably from a cornfield...Or China.

Now, as promised, so that you don't feel like your time was totally wasted be visiting my blog today... Here are lots of squishy baby photos to help you forget all about the fruitless rambling...

You've forgotten already, haven't you?

("Yes, thank you, my baby is adorable, isn't he?  He is 3 months old.  Do you want to be mom-friends?")

Friday, July 24, 2015


A few years back, I did not understand how people-watching was okay. As an introvert, The whole idea seemed pretty rude. I didn't want people looking at me, so why was it okay if I stared at them?  I have finally realized what you readers have probably understood all your lives. (When done with proper intentions,) People-watching isn't creepy-- It's community. By observing others we can learn about them and from them.

So thank you, man lying under the shade tree in the park, for reassuring me that I am not alone on this seemingly lazy day, and for reminding me that I should not take this "free" time for granted...that I should make more effort to enjoy this time and be truly appreciative of it.

Thank you, older man sitting on his walker seat, staring toward the lagoon as if searching for something...Thank you for reminding me to pray for those who grieve...and to be thankful for what I have.

Thank you, 10-year-old kids sitting at the picnic table with that teenager (although I really hope you were not talking about what I am pretty sure you were talking about…).Thank you for reminding me how short innocence can last.

Thank you, Dalito, the person I watch by far the most frequently... for your rewarding snuggles and smiles, even though they are eventually followed by your many cries. And thank you for enjoying stroller rides through the park on beautiful summer days so that Mommy can clear her head.

To all the friendly amblers and cyclists that I strolled past today-- Thank  you for saying "Hi." You might be the only adults besides Ryan that I will see all day today. 

To the people with the cute chairs on their front lawn-- Thank you for giving me food for thought. :)

I am blessed to have you all as part of my community.